Um, not sure what week this is...53 maybe?

Okay, I've been a total slacker on updating my blog lately so I thought I should probably get an update in June sometime. I am still dedicated to WW more than ever. I had a little bit of a lazy attitude about the program for about a month where I still lost but had a couple little gains and losses which shows I wasn't 100% with the program. I'm not sure what kicked my butt into high gear but I'm feeling really motivated again and excited to get to goal. I would still like to do that by my birthday in August but the meeting today told us that fixed dates can sometimes sabotage our efforts so I will just hope I get there eventually and won't be devestated if I don't get it by then. It would be REALLY nice to do it though. So my WI today showed a 2.4 lb loss for an official WW loss total of 92.8 lbs! Holy crap! It doesn't even seem real to me. It's like I can't even remember that yet at the same time, I do and it's very difficult for me to recognize in myself that I am an "average" body size now and I'm not seen as an "overweight" person anymore by the general public. I still feel like I am. I still have a problem with focusing on how far I have to go yet, not how far I've come. I also worry about the end result when I get to goal. Even though it will be an amazing accomplishment, I will have the battle scars of being a formerly overweight person with the loose skin and stretch marks and stuff. Plus I have that horrible disfiguring scar on my stomach that I've had since I was 6 weeks old and that doesn't help my self-esteem very much. I was told by a doctor once that I would be a good candidate for scar revision surgery so I might have to look into these things for the future. I don't know that I'll be 100% content unless these problems are taken care of and I don't have to be reminded of my damage every day for the rest of my life. Come on lotto!!!!!

In other news...today was the first day I ran 5k for the entire time! I went to the Y and ran it in 36 minutes 20 seconds! I have no idea if that's okay or not but I don't really care, I fricken ran for 36 straight minutes (well 40 technically, I couldn't remember what 5k was in miles so just to make sure I added some extra running) and I think that's great and not everyone can do that! Yeah me!

I don't have any really recent updated pictures right now but hopefully soon I will have a new comparison picture for you to see. I'm keeping at it...29 more lbs to go until goal and it can't come soon enough. :-)